I asked my girlfriend how her daughter liked the preschool that she had just started last week. She replied "She likes it but I am having the hardest time getting her to tell me anything about it."
I thought about Mason at that stage last year. I was tearing up as I kissed him goodbye in his little innocent classroom while he ran away excited to play with his new friends. When I picked him up I couldn't wait to hear all about his day. After grabbing his backpack, water bottle, and crafts from the day, all while lugging my 4 month old in that awful newborn car seat, I strap him into the car. I started the questions as soon as I put the car into drive. "How was your day?!" "Good!" (he excitedly replies) "How was your teacher and your friends?" (No response) "What did you have as a snack?" (Silence) "What did you do all day?" "I cant talk about it right now. Im just too hungry." (Mason finally replies) I am dumbfounded. I thought- oh my god he's grown into a teenager with just one day of preschool! I am desperate to know what he did all day. Now I must include that he was in great spirits throughout this all. He was smiling and laughing and was totally involved in everything happening in school as I stalked him for a good 10 minutes after dropping him off, so I couldnt imagine why he could not tell me what he did. Later that day, as I was making dinner, (and Mason was assisting. He is a fabulous assistant) he sees goldfish and says "Oh you got goldfish at the store? We had goldfish as a snack today and we had apple juice. It was really good, I got seconds." I was so excited, finally a glimpse into this school life. I played cool and asked a couple easy questions which he willingly answered. The next couple times I picked him up I tried to ask him "the questions" right after he got into the car and there was the same silence I received after that first day. It wouldn't be until later that day, or even later that week, that he would just open right up about his day. Finally it dawned on me that he needed time to process what he did at school, until he was ready to talk about it. I would notice as he was doing his "imaginative play" that he would be "the teacher" and his "friends" Woody, Buzz, Rex, Jessie were all "the students." He would act out his whole day, including his welcome and goodbye songs. I started trying to wait to ask him questions until we were alone and the house was quiet. He started to respond a lot better. He loves to "snuggle up" and watch a show so after our show was over I would turn it off and slowly ease into asking him about his day. It worked every time. Maybe its just something about needing to process all that stimulation and excitement that they experience at school, before they can put it into words.
Over the summer Mason went to a summer camp near my moms house. Knowing how he was with "the questions" I knew that we all had to proceed carefully when wanting to learn about his day. Aunt Claire, Mumsie, and I came up with the Question Session. Mason would stand on top of the ottoman in my moms living room (where he chose to be the center of attention, typical oldest child) and Claire, mom, and I would go around the room taking turns asking questions. It was such a fun way to talk with him about his day, while giving him the much needed attention he deserved.
Now that we are in California and all going on with new lives we feel that it is not just important to ask about Masons day but we should all ask about each other's day. So now we have family question time at night after Mason and Tommy return from work and school. It only takes about 15 minutes but it is such a special time to sit there, share our day, and really listen to each other. Even Ellie chimes in with a head shake, clap, and laugh.
These are the memories I'll hold onto forever.
Goodnight!
xox, k
Great observations and story to tell Kirby! Hold on to those memories. Your family will always be together if you all remember to take time to make your family feel special!
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